There are no words to describe how awesome this is.

But March the fourth made me whimper
When the news it was delivered
Sad news from the Troll Lord
And then on every message board

I can’t remember which of my dice
I chose to roll that very night
For the man who got it right
The day the DM died

So, bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Have you read the PHB
And have you looked through the DMG
And what the heck is a drow (drough)
This is going to be so f’n cool
My dwarf barbarian will make you drool
And I really think you pronounce it drow (cow)

Well I know that things are looking grim
The dragon’s looking right at him
Made a percentile roll
I’m now hiding in shadows

I was a lucky halfling, that’s a fact
Stole lots of things and put ‘em in my pack
But I knew I could never go back
The day the DM died

I started rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Now, for over ten years we’ve been rollin’ well
I even took my paladin to hell
But, boy, the rules have really changed
I was really sad to see half-orcs go
And what the hell is THACO
But, man, I really dig the weapon speed

Oh, and while the king was in L.A.
The jesters took his game away
The boardroom was adjourned
When the DM did return
And with pirates that would block the way
The king was told he couldn’t stay
But all that madness went away
The day the DM died

We were rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Holy moley I’m checkin’ out the ranger
Two-weapon fighting makes him a danger
DM’s think he’s a pain in the ass
Player’s monk ran out of gas
Every flurry just seemed to pass
Leaving the bad guy without a scratch

Now I really like these brand new feats
My half-orc fighter’s really neat
I tried to run a game
Oh, but it just wasn’t the same

‘Cause the players have kids of their own
And no one remembers what to roll
And we were shocked down to our soul
The day the DM died

We started rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Oh, and there we were just running the race
A generation losing pace
With no time left to game again
But come on let’s look through this brand new book
Man these powers really cook
You mean I get to play a dragon

And as I watched the gamers laugh
The memories came flooding back
Time it can go so fast
No living in the past

And as the dice rolled on into the night
I realized it just felt right
And I held back tears with all my might
The day the DM died

He was rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

I knew that when I read the news
I had just bid my childhood adieu
And I just sighed and turned away
I went down to the local store
Where I had gamed some years before
But the man there said that gamers couldn’t stay

And on the web the players mourned
About the game that he had born
Not a bad word was posted
The game master was toasted

And many folks admired the guy
Who’s rollin’ dice up in the sky
We told ourselves that we could cry
The day the DM died

And they were rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

They were rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy

And this is where we come to the heart of the matter.

It is 1971, THX 1138 was released on March 11, American Zoetrope is spiraling towards certain doom, Lucas has become even more disillusioned with Hollywood than he was during his stint on McKenna’s Gold, and where exactly things go from here for the upstart and its members is all up in the air. And while American Zoetrope and Coppola had slowly started to cause waves — mostly due to THX’s failure as it were, though also because Coppola wasn’t afraid of touting American Zoetrope a state-of-the-art facility which could outmatch Hollywood, and that the company (and thus himself) was the future of filmmaking — Lucas was little more than a promising student who had made an obscure sci-fi film which opened small and died fast.

During the summer of ’71, as all of this is happening, Gene Youngblood interviewed the then 27-year-old Lucas for a Los Angeles-based educational TV station, KCET in an hour-long program called George Lucas: Maker of Films.

The smell of e-books just got better

Does your Kindle leave you feeling like there’s something missing from your reading experience?

Have you been avoiding e-books because they just don’t smell right?

If you’ve been hesitant to jump on the e-book bandwagon, you’re not alone. Book lovers everywhere have resisted digital books because they still don’t compare to the experience of reading a good old fashioned paper book.

But all of that is changing thanks to Smell of Books™, a revolutionary new aerosol e-book enhancer.

Now you can finally enjoy reading e-books without giving up the smell you love so much. With Smell of Books™ you can have the best of both worlds, the convenience of an e-book and the smell of your favorite paper book.

Smell of Books™ is compatible with a wide range of e-reading devices and e-book formats and is 100% DRM-compatible. Whether you read your e-books on a Kindle or an iPhone using Stanza, Smell of Books™ will bring back that real book smell you miss so much.

Video embedded below

Trailer embedded below

This demo — from Pattie Maes’ lab at MIT, spearheaded by Pranav Mistry — was the buzz of TED. It’s a wearable device with a projector that paves the way for profound interaction with our environment. Imagine “Minority Report” and then some.

This technology is something that I can picture every gamer buying into it when it becomes more mainstream. Short term, it would get rid of the need to haul dozens of books to and from the gaming table. Long term, this will allow you to game anywhere at anytime using apps like OpenRPG or Fantasy Grounds. As Scotty would say, “I like this [future]. It’s exciting!”

More than anything, I think the reason I liked the show so much was because I’ve always been a fan of any humor that I can relate directly to D&D or any fantasy-based RPG. I love The Gamers movie because of just that. Here are some examples:

• The PC sees that the townsfolk are in trouble and decides to put a little flare into his rescue. Usually, when this happens, you get the following results:

• The PC is told, via some supernatural occurrence, that he is “the Chosen One.” Usually it’s a little anti-climactic but, change it to “the Golden One” and have it revealed while the enemy is reading the PCs diary and you get this:

• The beginning of the campaign starts quickly and action abounds! One of the PCs is threatened and the PC covering him shoots to help him but rolls a 1!

All in all, it’s a very funny show and we’ll definitely DVR it.

Once upon a time, when Earth was still a beautiful place, an evil force came to turn all living things into Vegetarians. Three students from suburban Massachusetts would step up against this catastrophe… to end Vegetarian Supremacy. Mark, Jesús, Maria and their foes would make amazing personal discoveries as the two forces clash. And so began the ultimate saga about friendship, heritage, sex and explosions.

Embedded video below

Image via Wikipedia

I have a seen a lot of well-deserved coverage on Dave Arneson being in the hospital but nothing on Aaron Allston. Aaron Allston is a long-standing member of the RPG community who made the jump to writing sci-fi and fantasy novels, most recently official Star Wars novel. He has contributed many ideas and books to the gaming community, with items in the Complete Fighter’s Handbook, the Dungeon Master’s design Kit, and GURPS, to name a few. For a complete list, go to his website and click Game Credits on the left.

He had a quadruple bypass April 2nd, it was originally supposed to be a single or double bypass but the doctors realized they had to do more, and is currently recuperating. You can keep with his status on his official update site. You can send your words of support to him at allston@AaronAllston.com.

Second, Jonathan Jacobs pointed me in the direction of the latest GeekDad post on Wired magazine‘s website. In it, GeekDad gave  a glowing review of the Open Game Table Anthology. He also, and this is so freaking cool, mentioned one of my articles (twice!) and even mentioned my name! For someone who not only is an avid gamer but works in the IT field, it’s doubly awesome! The article he is going to “use…as a discussion for our RPG group” is one entitle “Advice on Being a Good Player“. I’m extremely excited that the book is taking off. I plan on doing a big review once I get my hands on the final copy.

But March the fourth made me whimper
When the news it was delivered
Sad news from the Troll Lord
And then on every message board

I can’t remember which of my dice
I chose to roll that very night
For the man who got it right
The day the DM died

So, bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Have you read the PHB
And have you looked through the DMG
And what the heck is a drow (drough)
This is going to be so f’n cool
My dwarf barbarian will make you drool
And I really think you pronounce it drow (cow)

Well I know that things are looking grim
The dragon’s looking right at him
Made a percentile roll
I’m now hiding in shadows

I was a lucky halfling, that’s a fact
Stole lots of things and put ‘em in my pack
But I knew I could never go back
The day the DM died

I started rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Now, for over ten years we’ve been rollin’ well
I even took my paladin to hell
But, boy, the rules have really changed
I was really sad to see half-orcs go
And what the hell is THACO
But, man, I really dig the weapon speed

Oh, and while the king was in L.A.
The jesters took his game away
The boardroom was adjourned
When the DM did return
And with pirates that would block the way
The king was told he couldn’t stay
But all that madness went away
The day the DM died

We were rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Holy moley I’m checkin’ out the ranger
Two-weapon fighting makes him a danger
DM’s think he’s a pain in the ass
Player’s monk ran out of gas
Every flurry just seemed to pass
Leaving the bad guy without a scratch

Now I really like these brand new feats
My half-orc fighter’s really neat
I tried to run a game
Oh, but it just wasn’t the same

‘Cause the players have kids of their own
And no one remembers what to roll
And we were shocked down to our soul
The day the DM died

We started rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Oh, and there we were just running the race
A generation losing pace
With no time left to game again
But come on let’s look through this brand new book
Man these powers really cook
You mean I get to play a dragon

And as I watched the gamers laugh
The memories came flooding back
Time it can go so fast
No living in the past

And as the dice rolled on into the night
I realized it just felt right
And I held back tears with all my might
The day the DM died

He was rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

I knew that when I read the news
I had just bid my childhood adieu
And I just sighed and turned away
I went down to the local store
Where I had gamed some years before
But the man there said that gamers couldn’t stay

And on the web the players mourned
About the game that he had born
Not a bad word was posted
The game master was toasted

And many folks admired the guy
Who’s rollin’ dice up in the sky
We told ourselves that we could cry
The day the DM died

And they were rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy
Thank you Mr. d20 Guy

They were rollin’
Bye, bye Mr. d20 Guy
Failed the final saving throw and then didn’t survive
And all around the world, the gamers did cry
Sayin’ thank you Mr. d20 Guy

Once received, the group will review it thoroughly and make a decision. You will be notified of our decision within 7-10 business days of receipt.

We know that you have many choices when it comes to gaming groups and we appreciate you wanting to join ours. Thank you once again for your application and we look forward to hearing from you soon. Klaatu barada nikto.

Age:

Weight:

Sex (your application will automatically be rejected if you answer “yes” here):

If you are male, have you ever talked to a girl? Yes / No

If “Yes,” what was it like?

What is your favorite snack food?

What snacks would you bring to the table?

How long have you been gaming?

What is your preferred RPG system and why?

Have you ever participated in a LARP? Yes / No

If “Yes,” seriously?

How do you pronounce “drow?” (Circle one)

Drow as in Cow / Drow as in Dough / Drow as in Steve

Have you, or any of your relatives, ever been diagnosed as “being emo”? Yes / No

If “Yes,” when was the last time you shopped at Hot Topic?

Which player type do you most associate with? (Circle one)

• Actor
• Explorer
• Fraking Nuts
• Instigator
• Power Gamer
• Slayer
• Storyteller
• Thinker
• Watcher

If you circled anything other than Power Gamer, are you sure? Don’t lie. We know when people lie.

Why do you associate with your selected player type?

Which Monty Python movies have you seen? Make sure to list them in order of the original date of release.

Will you quote any of these movies at the table? Yes / No

If “Yes,” how often and do you like being stabbed?

What is your favorite class/race/Denny’s “Slam”/alignment?

List a few “catch phrases” you’ve been known to yell at the gaming table when your character does something really cool in combat.

List the number of times you’ve been scolded/stared at/punched for yelling out a “catch phrase” at the gaming table.

How did Black Leaf die and whose fault was it?

Essay Section

All answers must be no more than 2500 characters. Points will be removed from your final score if you do. If you need more space for your essay, ask your proctor for an additional blue book.

1) Orc and Pie – Humorous parody or acute observation on the plight of young women in today’s male dominated society?

2) OD&D – Is it the one true D&D and how do all other editions pale in comparison?

3) Tom’s 3rd edition monk needs to jump over a pit that is 11.25 feet wide by 15.84 feet long by 30.1 feet deep. The monk has a total Jump modifier of +8 but has been recently cursed so that his Strength attribute has been reduced by 6 points. He is also carrying a medium load because he ate a heavy breakfast and it isn’t sitting well with him. Given the fact that he must traverse up an incline of 27 degrees (F) and that there is a bag of marbles in front of the pit that was accidentally left there by the son of the dungeon keeper, what must Tom roll on a d20 to successfully clear the pit by 3.67 feet. Show your work.

4) You’re in a shipwreck and are currently floating in the ocean, clinging desperately to a piece of flotsam. In the distance, you spot a small island that you can easily swim to. On the way, you spot three things floating as well; a shrink-wrapped Book of Erotic Fantasy, a shrink-wrapped autographed copy of Monte Cook’s Ptolus, and a scantily-clad blonde woman who will do anything if you save her. You only have time to grab one of them before the rest are swept out to sea, never to be seen again. Which do you grab? Be honest.

5) Bards should be able to put ranks in Perform (mime) and not be ridiculed by the other players; agree or disagree? Explain your reasons. Additionally, if you chose to agree, attempt to justify your existence.

Signature ___________________________________________

Date _______________________________________________

Click here for a copy of the application

Click to read the flowchart

Flowchart originally found here.

Note: I’m not singing on this one (I may later but not right now) so I’m posting the original song in video form below.

Stuck in the Dark with a Grue

Stuck in the dark with a grue.

Yes I’m stuck in the dark with a grue

Stuck in the dark with a grue.

Well I started out with nothing,

Hee… Hee… Hee…

Finally killed the thief with the knife

Stuck in the dark with a grue.

Well I started out with nothing,

Hee… Hee… Hee…

Well I’m seein’ a house that is white

I opened the trapdoor,

Can’t find the damn lamp, here I am,

Stuck in the dark with a grue.

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• J.J. Abrams would like to make a Zork game

Yesterday, I searched through all the movies that were classified as Fantasy and/or Science Fiction. There are a lot of good movies out there that can be used for inspiration. So if you have a Netflix account and are looking for a spark to put into your RPG, just search for these and fire it up in your browser!

Each link goes to the page in Netflix to add it to your Netflix Instant Watch queue (if you’re a Netflix member, of course)

Big Trouble in Little China

A classic pulp action comedy. It’s got a smart-ass main character, an immortal bad guy, and a funky beholder. Almost the perfect movie and the makings of an almost perfect pulp RPG.

Buck Rogers in the 25th Century (Entire series)

The classic sci-fi TV series from the late 1970′s. I still have a huge crush on Erin Gray. If you’re playing a Sci-Fi RPG, this is good for inspiration on NPCs (bee-dee, bee-dee, bee-dee) and plot.

Clash of the Titans

Titans, Pegasus, Krakens, Medusa, and Greek Gods. All of the makings of a great fantasy game.

Dragonheart

It’s not a perfect movie but it’s got a great twist to the old knights vs. dragons plot. A knight befriends the last dragon to defeat the BBEG. Of course, no one likes the dragon at first because they’re “evil.” But, by the end, they’re all one big happy family.

Dungeons and Dragons

Yeah, it sucks but it does have some “ok” story elements. If nothing else, you learn that a beholder can be easily distracted by throwing a rock.

Excalibur

Personally, I think this is a crappy movie and never got into it. However, it is the classic King Arthur tale and stars Gabriel Byrne, Liam Neeson, and Patrick Stewart.

Justice League: The New Frontier

This is a fantastic new animated movie set in the golden age of comics. Hal Jordan is the central character, played up grandly as a pacificist who is a grand choice for Green Lantern. RPG-wise, it shows what a truly conflicted hero can be. One who is truly confused as to whether or not to take the job. Do you take the job to protect hundreds of thousands of people when that job requires you to sometimes use violence?

Ladyhawke

A great mystery/fantasy adventure/romance. Great plot twist with the two lovers forced to live in the same world, but one always in light and the other always in darkness. Can the PC bring the lovers together and stop the evil that is keeping them apart?

Legend

The main character has to fight evil to keep the woman he loves. Classic fantasy tale.

The 13th Warrior

A band of warriors intent on stopping evil and saving a town from destruction. Sound familiar?

The Beastmaster

The quintessential Druid and how to play it.

The Day the Earth Stood Still

The classic sci-fi tale of saving the planet from total destruction.

The Golden Voyage of Sinbad

It’s an entire campaign wrapped up in a 105 minute movie. It has all the elements of a major story-arcing fantasy adventure.

The Neverending Story

A “real person” pulled in to a fantasy world filled with all kinds of great characters. A true “through the looking glass” movie that would be a lot of fun to play as an RPG.

Of course, there are more than just these to instantly watch but these are the ones that I think could easily give you inspiration in your current campaign. So go out there! If you’re a member of Netflix, put these in your Queue! If you’re not, you can try a two-week trial and see how it works!

Hack and Slash – The Christmas Song (sung to the tune of Jingle Bells)

Who the hell is this?
Why is he talking?
Is something amiss?
God I hate thinking
I am really bored
Not sure what I should do
So I decide to grab my sword
And run the bastard through

Oh, hack and slash, hack and slash
Hacking all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC
Hack and slash, hack and slash
Slashing all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC

The DM is upset
He’s a big curser
I don’t think he gets
I’m just playing my character
He yells at me to stop
Ruining his game
So I throw down my d20
And tell him talking’s lame

Oh, hack and slash, hack and slash
Hacking all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC
Hack and slash, hack and slash
Slashing all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC

I’m packing up my stuff
Put my sheet in the bag
The DM’s in a huff
He’s looking really mad
Says he wants my sheet
I ask him what it’s for
Says he’s going to kill him off
And I run out the door

Oh, hack and slash, hack and slash
Hacking all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC
Hack and slash, hack and slash
Slashing all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC

Hack and slash, hack and slash
Hacking all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC
Hack and slash, hack and slash
Slashing all the way
Oh what fun it is to kill
A random NPC